Thursday, April 29, 2010

Looking for inspiration

The other day at Starbucks I saw some people I knew. We had a conversation, and it somehow went into the direction of " in the old times things were better, but now they are worse." Specifically, that now children seem to have to do more to attract attention of their peers, "more" being - more dangerous, more outrageous, even criminal. That, compared to us, today's youth is borderline insane.... But, then, again, we are old people - and the new generation is always more... everything compared to the old one, right?
During the whole conversation - or the line of monologues with comments, if you will - I could not help feeling the uselessness of the whole thing. What are we talking about? Why are we talking about it? What are we going to do about all this - and when, if ever? I already knew the answers to all these questions - nothing, no point, and never. It made me feel like I was just wasting my time...
Then, one gentleman (in answering my question) stated that, when developing a relationship, or dating, he would prefer to "get over the sexual tension" by having sex right away, and then "continue on from there." Have sex first - ask questions later, is that it? What's the rush?
He reminded me of one character from the Russian movie "Ordinal Wonder" - The Minister Administrator. In this fairy tale, the Minister approaches the Magician's wife with the words, " I have no time for courting. You are attractive; I am devilishly attractive, - why waste time? I will see you at midnight near the barn." Of course, she very appropriately answers, " Not a chance. Also, I will complain to my husband, and will turn you into a rat." I wonder if that gentleman has been getting similar answers.
In any case: whatever we talk about - I start wondering about the purpose of talking about it. "Don't talk; do." One of my teachers used to say that a lot. But what to do? I need inspiration; something to take over me and give meaning to my life.


  1. Hi Katya,

    Sad accounting of the superficiality of much human communication and interaction isn't it?

    We humans are so blessed to be conscious beings, yet waste this presence now.

    Hope you find inspiration and purpose.

    In the Light,

  2. Yes it is, it's very sad. The problem I have is that I feel how useless all this talk is, but at the same time I still join these conversations - in hope that, maybe, next time it will be better...
    On a happier note, I am reading "To Kill a Mockingbird" now - and when I read it I know my time is definitely not wasted. Good books tend to keep one's sanity at times of desperate need for meaningful conversation.


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